Three days after he came to me again, for another painful sexual session. I have just recovered from the previous one and I was scared I would be bruised for the second time and I couldn’t handle it. It was a little after midnight when I heard the door open from outside and I knew instantly it was him.

For some reason we have never had a conversation ever since I arrived and I got to know he get things done his way so there is always no conversations. The only times I have seen him talk to any of the wives was to Alice when he asks her to cook a particular meal for him.

I never cooked for him since I arrived and the only meals I cook are for me alone. It gets boring with same routine over again and I missed home and mama so much. The only routine different for me was the day times I spend on the farm growing yams. Mr Kunle acted like he owed us since he bought us with his bride price and it was always his way and there is no way you can say no to him.

He was rough as usual hitting me when I try resisting. I wished I could fight back but I dared not or else I would receive a beating all I had to do was endure. The next morning Alice rushed into my room as she must have heard the screams. She looked at me with pity as I lay there. She didn’t seem surprised and I figured he did the same thing to her. She cleaned me up with hot water and my body ached with pain. So was my vagina as he was very rough. I wished I could just die and leave the world as I didn’t know how to escape the torture and pain but the thought of mama made me dismiss the idea. The whole day, I just lay in bed planning of a possible way to escape to the city but I had no money and dint know how to go about it.

That night Mr. Kunle came again it continued like that every night with a different torture each day to suit his sexual fantasies and I became used to it and didn’t cry or fight back during one of his usual sessions. He only never visited when I was menstruating only to return the next day I am done. I was like his sex toy trying everything possible with me and with Alice always there to consol me. Something in me died that didn’t even give me the strength to plan an escape as I thought I would before.

I was just living watching myself get abused over and over again with a traumatized mind and a sad face. Mum never visited me even once and I wondered about how she was feeling in health or how she felt about my absence. Alice always looked at e with pity in her eyes every morning after Mr. Kunle visits my room but I never pitied myself. It has been four months into my arranged marriage with Mr Kunle and becoming his sex toy when I got seriously sick on morning after the usual marathon of sex. I was feverish ,throwing up and feeling nauseous .I couldn’t go out my room the whole day and when Alice came to my room in the night my temperature was so high I could feel my body burning up. She runs to the eldest wife who came rushing into my room with a bowl of herbs, placing them on my head to cool down my temperature.

That night Mr. Kunle didn’t come to my room as he heard I was sick. The sickness continued for three days and all those nights Mr. Kunle didn’t visit to check how I was faring and for some reason I was happy as it was some sort of escape from sex. On the fourth day when I couldn’t get off bed as the previous days impatient Mr. Kunle sent for the traditional healer even though we were just beside the hospital.

I wasn’t sent to the hospital which could have been the best option but in my village not many people visited the hospital so Mr. Kunle ordering the traditional healer to come check n me wasn’t surprising. She diagnosed me for being pregnant which made me broke into tears and I felt my dreams was finally shattered now that I have being turned into a baby making machine. Alice told me to be happy as I could bear a child for Mr. Kunle but I wasn’t happy about it neither was Mr. Kunle to my surprise and relief.