its been months since rapheal came out to me and our friendship hasnt been any stronger.he prefers men and i pretend there is a relationship to get our parents believing there is.i have watched him being more comfortable around me and alwaysreminding me of how greatful he is for me to have kept his secrets.my parents and his were obviously happy and couldnt wait for Rapheal to finish his bar exams so they could marry us off and just hearing them talk baffles me.if only they knew.if the reverend found out his only son was gay, i wonder how he is going to take it; accept or reject him.a just an morally upright man who preaches against everything.if this close knitted and religious community finds out it will travel and the more i thought about it the more scared i got for Rapheal. he could lose his part time job and even be isolated with noone wanting to associate with him.his father may lose his position,that was how the community i live in approaches such matters. if he only knew whta could happen to him.he would be more careful with chris and concentrate on his exams.he spent more time with chris at his apartment making up excuses he is spending time with me and his parents never suspected anything was wrong even happier such incidents were going on between us but all was lies.i just would leave home and go to a friends so it seems true. so when it was his his birth an his mother made plans for him to come over for dinner he declined stating he had made plans with me but in reality he was spending it with chris his clingy boyfriend.i had to leave home to a friends place in another town to me it sems true to my parents as we always do and i began hating the idea of knowing and covering up for him. his parents however ,knowing we would be at Rapheal apartment with take out and watching movies which was what he told them.but his parents planned a suprise birthday since it was his first birthday i get to spend with him without him nor i knowing.
at least if i had known,i would have told hom to be careful with chris.his parents and mine had made cakes with a few of the members of the youth meeting he presides over and a few members of the church mostly young girls made a way to Rapheal house and what happened after was a shock and tragedy.
they made a small group suffled themselves into eacothers cars making a group of 12 with my parents and his.they were quiet opening the door slowly with cakes and candles and walking towards his bedroom.they would have screamed suprise and light the candles but the scene that met them i hear made the group scream out with horror. rapheal and chris were at it doin what they do best that they idnt notice any feets entering the room.my mom told me they thought was me at first and dint ind saying suprise at us when we were at it. the flicks the switch and screamed surp withut eatind it it with prise when they saw the reverend son and an unknow boy fucking hteir assholes.i heard the revered thre the cake he had in his hands at him and some took pictures of him.everybody run out leaving the tow of them with themselves. whilst i was in another town preparing to go to bed which and go to bed before retrning home the next day.i had fun wirth my old friends and went to a cliub where i met a young man,we had the time of our live that i didnt hear my phone ringing. i must have passed out thatwhen i woke up and checked my phoneit was the most missed call i had seen in my life.with messages from mother screaming come home now.i saw ,=many ags on my my notification from facebook and as made my way home i went through the facebook and was horrified and errified to see the half naked body of chris with rapheal hence the calls.i decided to pass by rapheal house to see how he was doin g before headng hme.getting to his hoise were people standing around waiting for him to come out so they boo or hoot at his.people satred whispering when i made mu way ther but i didnt catre just wanted to see how my find was doing before thinking of how to face myparents.what met me in his hall keeps repeating itself in my mind everyfay.there was raphel tied to the seiling of the fan wit a rope dead.he commited suicide a fe w days before graduation.he had scribbled a note and i grabbedit placing it into my back pocket before lrtting out a sceam.i cried my eyes out as people rushed him taking picures disgracing him even in his death.they wanted to cu his body down and drag him through the strrets but the police were there to take the body away. when i got home home that evning with my eyes drenched of those tears i had hed for rapheal,my mum dared not ask me a qustion neither did m dad i made myway to my room kookinf the door nd taking out the piee of papwer he scribbled down.’katie,they found out,am sorry for opting out like a coward but being dead i would at least get to make one decision fo myself which i deem fit for myself.dont cry for me as i ditn die invoulubntarily i died happy away from this world were i wouldnt be who i desired.you are he one person who ever acepted me for me and i hope we meet someday when m straight so we could carry on our great friendship.tmy hands were trembling and it made me cry the more.i is the hardest i have ever cried for someone and losing rapheal was even painful than i thought.that friend not being there aymore hurtsrapheal rapheal why did he opt out so soon??#